“Often, it’s not about becoming a new person, but becoming the person you were meant to be, and already are, but don’t know how to be.”
― Box of Hair: A Fairy Tale
Click here to access the Self-Acceptance Worksheet:
Self-acceptance is usually the first milestone towards self-love. I struggled with this for a long time. Before I could fully accept myself, I actually had to answer the question: who are you?
Honestly, the first time my therapist asked me, who are you? I realized that I knew the roles I played, daughter, sister, friend, etc. but I was not too sure who I was.
I did not even know the things I liked to do. I spent so much of my time in survival mode, that I never really mastered “living”. I’ve since tried some new things and am learning to live life instead of just survive.
I created this little worksheet (because I am a total nerd and I love to scribble things down) that I think will help you discover parts of yourself. Perhaps, you haven’t given it much thought, but these little exercises might help. The other cool thing is to save them and see how you change from time to time (click the link called: Self-Acceptance Worksheet).
How to Answer the Question
What makes you you? First of all, we are multifaceted beings. There are different aspects to what makes us who we are. I struggled answering this question for some time. I actually figured out that I was overthinking the answers (not a thing I usually do, by the way… OK, that’s a lie).
To answer the question, “who am I?” I simply began by finishing the sentence:
I am __________________.
For example, here are my responses:
- I am responsible.
- I am strong willed and independent.
- I am quirky.
- I am compassionate.
- I am patient (or so I have been told).
- I am bubbly.
- I am kind.
- I am a hopeless romantic.
- I am affectionate.
- I am an over-thinker, but also sensitive.
Here are some other questions you can look to help answer this question:
- What are your likes and dislikes?
- What are your strengths?
- What are your weaknesses?
- Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
- What are you passionate about?
- How would you describe your personality?
Full-length Mirror
After you have a better idea of who you are, then the next step is self-acceptance.
Self-acceptance is not an excuse to be a nasty little person. Self-acceptance is about accepting your present flaws, strengths, vices, and virtues, but being patient and compassionate with yourself as you continue to grow and evolve. It’s about seeing yourself in a full-length mirror and loving yourself today and giving yourself room to be authentically you.
I have always NO ONE ever becomes the best version of themselves without love. Once we learn to love ourselves, everything else falls into place.
Best of luck!